Back on the saddle

After months of hiding my head in the sand, I popped my head up and took a long look in the mirror. Let me tell you, I knew it was bad, but GEEZ! It almost made me pop right back into that hole. Somehow I managed to keep my sanity - if not some of my self respect- and made plans.
I have been eating less. A lot less. Just today, I left most of my beloved breakfast from my favorite joint on my plate. It was so hard to walk away from that one egg, the piece of extra crispy bacon, and the 2 1/2 pieces of french toast that sat there calling my name. It all kept saying, "How can you leave me here? The cook will think you stopped liking her cooking. You're going to hurt her feelings. How can you resist the gooey, buttery french toast dripping with syrup? And you know you need protein. What better way to eat protein than thru crunchy, crispy bacon? The cook made it extra crispy just for you." The egg didn't seem to have much to say. It let the other two do all the talking.
Despite all the pressure from my meal, I persevered and walked away. I did wipe a tear from my eye, but it was tiny.

THEN....
I did the unthinkable.

I actually got on my bike.

Not only that, but I rode it.

Yep, I rode 6.8 miles today. I was pretty amazed. I really didn't expect to make it. I figured it was a toss up between my shoulder giving out or my legs calling it quits. My shoulder was a real trooper and is just now starting to get stiff and a little sore. Nothing an 800 mg of Ibuprofen won't help. My legs - though they screamed all the way - actually showed up. There was a couple of times that it almost felt like old times. Almost.

The best part? The thing that made me almost tinkle my britches in pure delight?!

I managed to climb the hill that previously bit my hiney and spit it out in chunks - without stopping. I managed to keep a pretty even pace. Not to bad for just starting. Umm... Again.

Now, I have to thank Fisherhead. It is a HUGE help to have someone riding with you. I don't know what it is, but it makes it easier, somehow. Maybe it has something to do with not embarrassing myself. OR, I don't want to let him (or anyone else I ride with) down. Maybe it gives you something to be competitive about. Though I don't feel competitive towards him when we're riding. So, I think it is just the moral support. Just knowing that someone else is huffing and puffing too makes you feel better. Misery loves company must count in bike riding too.

Keep going

Still working out at the un-Godly hour of 5:30. I like doing it, I just wish it wasn't so hard to get up in the morning. Anyway, I've decided to quit whining about it and just do the work like a big girl. So, that is last whiny thing I will say on this subject. (I can't guarantee that I won't whine about other things. Get Real Folks! I'm only 40. I still have some growing up to do.)
I really am feeling better these days. I think my clothes are starting to fit looser, but I'm not certain. I'm not seeing a lot of progress on the scale, but since I'm lifting weights, I know that may take a while to show up.
Since I started taking iron again, I'm not getting as tired as before. Yipee!
I'm going to look up some bike rides tonight in order to have a goal. I really, for all my griping, don't want to quit what I have started. Boredom is one of the big workout breakers. I'm going to avoid it, if at all possible.
When I I manage to get past that magic number on my scale, I'll let you know. You will probably hear me yelling and screaming from your house. But, just in case, I'll post it too.

Progress

We have been dragging ourselves out of bed at 4:45 each weekday for two weeks now. I can't say I'm loving it, but I can say it is sooo worth it. Jess has a much better attitude about it than do. I keep hoping that something will happen to keep us from going that early. I'm not asking for much maybe a mild earthquake, a barfing dog, or a hangnail will do. But once I get there, I am very glad that I am there - and getting it over with. Needless to say the "I can't wait to get to the gym" mindset has not kicked in.

However, a friend, who sees me everyday, recently told me she was able to see a difference. So hey! The workouts might be paying off! I'm just looking for a change on the scale and in my jeans. (I am seeing some difference in my tops, but the jeans are proving to be stubborn.)

To keep me on track, I'm going to put my workout out there for all to see (and laugh at.) I'm trying to remember that I'm just beginning. So, no smart comments about being a wimp or something. I hear tons of that in my head already.

OK. I trade off days between lifting weights and cardio stuff. On Cardio days, I spend 30 minutes on the treadmill (one with a TV, of course.) On the fives and tens, I jog for one minute. It works out that I end up with a four minute walk and one minute jog. Pretty wimpy I know, but it is better than only walking. To top off the cardio days, I either ride a bike or do the elliptical for 15 minutes. I dread this day. It is sweaty, nasty, and hard. Yep. No fun for me until it is over. Then I try to leave the gym with a spring in my step and a smile on my face. Unfortunately, I have only managed to walk upright and not glare at the desk attendant.

My Favorite, but by no means easier, day is my weight day, as I call it. On those days, I tend to walk on the treadmill for 15 minutes to get my heart pumping and wake myself up a little. Then I start lifting. It looks something like this:

1. Abdominal Crunch - 70 lbs
2. Back Extension - 85 lbs
3. Lateral Pull down - 60 lbs
4. Seated Row - 40 lbs
5. Shoulder Press - 20 lbs
6. Chest Press - 20 lbs
7. Pectoral Fly - 55 lbs
8. Biceps Curl - 40 lbs
9. Triceps Extension - 45 lbs
10. Leg Extension - 70 lbs
11. Seated Leg Curl - 70 lbs
12. Leg Press - 130 lbs
13. Hip Abduction - 150 lbs
14. Hip Adduction - 150 lbs
15. Horizontal Calf - 130 lbs
16. Glutes - 80 lbs
17. Finally, I do this thing I think is called the Roman Chair. You stand in it at about a 45 degree angle. There is this pad that sits at hip level. When you manage to get into this thing, you bend over as far as possible and straighten back up. I do this 10 times just straight up and down. To get more of my abs, I do this exercise 10 more times with a 10lb weight as I rotate to each side.

When I leave on these days, I'm a little tender in the muscle areas and I'm pooped, but I'm not near as sweaty. I just hate sweating. I think that should be left to guys. Guys seem to like to sweat. They seem all happy and invigorated after they sweat. Me, I just feel nasty. There is nothing nastier than having a bead of sweat roll down your back. Yuck!!!

What time is it?

I started the day out with this emerging from my lips, "What time is it?" It was 4:45. A great time to get up and get ready to hit the gym. Yeah, right. I'm surprised I remembered to brush my teeth this morning. Though, morning breath might have come in handy in order to get one of the TV treadmills.
Who thought of this nutty plan to move our workouts to the early, early AM? Jess, of course. I would never think of such a crazy thing. I like to sleep. Well, OK. He might have had a little help from me. But just a little. I tried to talk him out of it.
See I like working out in the morning. It energizes me makes me feel strong and fit, even though it is only in my mind. Plus the thought of my workout doesn't sit on my mind all day as something I have to do. By the time I get off work, I am usually dreading it. So Jess suggested we try working out before work. That would be a great idea, if I didn't leave the house at 6:30 every morning. So, all workout-ing would have to be finished before then. That means - you guessed it - getting to the gym no later than 5:30.
We did it though. We walked (crawled) in bleary eyed at a chipper (insane) 5:30 in the morning. I jumped (dragged myself) onto the only treadmill with a TV and jogged (walked) for 15 minutes at 3.6 mph. Then, I hit the weights. I just love those weights! I don't want to look like a body builder or anything (EeekS!), but I always feel stronger after lifting. Then, I rushed (at a snails pace) to my car and drove bright eyed and bushy tailed to work. Well, that lasted about 5 minutes then reality sank in. Then I turned into tired and dragging, I was just hoping to get to work before I sank below the steering wheel.
But you know what? It was sooo worth it! I don't have to work out this afternoon. I am enjoying my evening without trying to fit everything around my workout. It's amazing. Now, I'm not looking forward to tomorrow, but at least I'm not dreading it.

another day, another workout

Managed 45 minutes on the treadmill today. I really didn't want to go. I really didn't want to go. But, I made myself; which isn't easy since Jess won't do the "Get off your lazy tush!" thing. Once there, I always manage to feel good. Frankly, most of the time, I even end up enjoying it. It's just getting in the car and going that is the hard part.

I don't think 45 minutes is too bad for a Monday. I jogged 3- 45 second sprints during the last 5 minutes of the workout. I'm going to try to incorporate more of these sprints on my next cardio day. Tomorrow is a 15 minute cardio followed by weights, which is my favorite. I just love lifting weights.

Want to know what else I love? I love the treadmills with the little TV on it. They really make the time go by faster. Today, I watched Clean House. Which is just mindless and trashy enough to keep my mind off my jiggly saddle bags. (I just know they are putting the people behind me in a hypnotic trance with their constant up, down, and sideways jello-ish movement. I swear everyone of those poor, skinny people have a glazed look on their face when I turn around and step off the treadmill.)

Uh Oh...

I just spent the entire weekend with that wonderful person - Aunt Paula. (She's my fister's aunt from Virginia that somehow adopted me before she knew what she was getting into.) She is great. A real hoot. I love her to death. She is also, a diet KILLER! The woman is obsessed with chocolate. I could live with that. Everyone has their thing, right?! But, Aunt Paula, insists that everyone in her immediate vicinity ( about 50 feet) indulge in her obsession with her. Chocolate is the food of love, after all. Besides, when she reaches that euphoric chocolate high, she doesn't want anyone around her to bring her down. With that in mind, maybe you can understand how I somehow managed to have 3 ooey, gooey deserts this weekend. Now, I feel icky, yucky and chubbier than ever. It's off to the gym for me tomorrow!

* Fister - is someone that is not in anyway related to you - by marriage, genetics, or legal adoption, but you would give a kidney, carry their baby, or babysit their children for 2 weeks and still want to be a part of their lives afterwards. In other words, She is my best friend who I wish could have been my sister in real life. We both might have turned out WAY different if given that opportunity.

Working in the coal mines...

Going down. Down. Down.
Working in the Coal mines.....

Wait a minute! That wasn't the coal mines! It was the gym!!!!

I have been to the gym 4 of the last 5 days. I am tired, but pleasantly so. I am sore, but not incapacitated. I am not weighing myself until Sunday morning, so I don't know if it is showing, yet.

Today I realized that I have a different attitude about the gym. I am not as concerned with how other, fitter, people see me. They can think what ever they want. I'm really not going to worry about it. I am there to break a cycle in my life. I need it to stop now. My life will eventually depend on me being healthy. That is a fact for everyone. In the future, I really don't want to come down with some illness that I could have prevented by being fitter and healthier.

It really isn't so much about looks anymore. It is about me, my health and happiness. I don't know what size I will end up. I don't know what is my ideal weight. I just want to find a good place for my body to be comfortable. I hope that makes sense to someone.